I woke up Sunday morning and opened up my website. I often open up my own website, and the truth is I’m not really sure why. It’s like I’m just making sure it’s still there, kinda like how guys grab their crotches. We’re all just checking. So imagine, male readers, that one Sunday morning you woke up, grabbed your crotch as usual and YOUR BALLS WERE MISSING and in their place were Palestinian militants. Yes, yes! That’s exactly how I felt.
My website was hijacked by – I swear I am not making this up – a militant Palestinian group using my depository of pithy comment and Chihuahua pictures to call for jihad.
What do you even do with that? The truth is I should’ve been far more pissed than I was, but to get yourself good and cheesed off, you have to be able to wrap your mind around the injustice. And I just couldn’t. Come on! I write pee-pee jokes. Pee-pee jokes to jihad? Who can comprehend that?
And what do you even do in that situation? This was not in the blogger handbook. So I did what any rational person would do. I ran screaming into the living room like my tail was on fire, hollering, “Emergency! Emergency!” and so scaring the crap out of my husband that I’m pretty sure he peed just a little.
And that’s pretty much all I did because, let’s face it, my role in web design mostly consists of going, “Do you think that peach is a little too Sunny-D looking?” and “More Chihuahuas!”
All told it took about seven hours to find the malicious code, remove it and restore pithy comments and puppies to their rightful places. Oh, and to make some security updates lest Hamas get any notions.
My musings on waffles and underpants are staying put, darn it.